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Interview with Athel Forsythia
Question: So, is it sad to see the series finally come to a close? Answer: You bet it is. I got bills to pay. I mean, back when we did the second one. What was it called, the Reluctant Chef or whatever, I nearly turned down the role. Oh yeah, I thought I had hit the big time and the offers would be rolling in. I think we both know it really didn’t turn out that way. Question: I think everyone agrees that this is probably your best dramatic work to date. Answer: It is, actually, and I’m super proud of it. What you see on the finished page is beautiful. What is not so beautiful is how it got there. Question: What do you mean? Answer: Mr. Yeager is an old school director. A method director you might say. A maniac you might say. A sadistic heartless ball of puss you might say. A simpering peevish little… Question: I think the readers get the point. Answer: No, I’m not done! The guy is a monster to work with. If he wanted up to be cold, he’d turn up the air conditioning. If he wanted us to be miserable, he’d spray us with a hose right before the scene was shot. If he wanted us to be scared, he’d blast an air horn just off screen. He never warned us, not once. We never knew what to expect. We were all a nervous wreck by the end of each day of shooting. I lost thirteen pounds just form the stress. Did you know that he intentionally gave us food poisoning once just so we’d look sickly for a shot the next day? And then it rained, so we couldn’t shoot the scene. And when we got back to it, he poisoned us again! Question: So why work with him? Answer: I got bills to pay! But now I’m going to pay them another way. The other actors and I are putting together a class action lawsuit against him. Did you know there wasn’t a single fake bruise in the entire book? Yup, to save costs he made the stunt guys beat each other up for real. I mean, they are stunt guys so they actually like that sort of thing, but still, how much can stage makeup actually cost? Question: It is rumored that the production went way over budget. Answer: That was all from the location shots. For the finale they built this enormous floating ziggurat thing floating out in the ocean. Then a hurricane blew it to pieces. So, they built another one, and that one sank. I think the third one was stolen. We never did actually get to perform on the thing. The finale was shot on top of a Wendy’s that someone painted black. |
